King John

There were two brothers. Richard the Lionheart was handsome, kind, brave, clever, romantic, popular man and King of England and a bit of France. John was ugly, cruel, cowardly, clever (as well), unromantic, unpopular man and only got Ireland.


King John (the lackland) 1199 1216
King John was someone you would not let marry your daughter. He grabbed cash from all his poor downtrodden subjects so that he could live in luxury and defend his French possessions. He was always bad at battles (they did not call him softsword for nothing) and lost most of them. He murdered his young nephew Arthur in 1203 because he had a better claim to the throne. In the war that followed he lost nearly all what remained of his French dominions. Later he upset the Church and was excommunicated (not allowed to talk to God). This did not worry him too much (he was not such a sincere churchgoer), but he did, out of spite, grab all the Churchs possessions. This fed up a bunch of barons so they rebelled and captured London (can you imagine?). He was forced to stick his seal on the Magna Carta (in 1215) and that greatly reduced his enormous power. In the end the rebels invited Prince Louis of France to come and sit at the throne (what a cheek!). That happened in 1216. Then there was a long civil war, but John died during that year.

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Source: John Farman – The Very Bloody History of England part 1